I read this on lilybleu's journal and i thought it merited posting on mine. ^_^ erm, with my answers and a little help from hers because she puts things nicely and im still asleep.

~~

The Ten Best Things About Being Me:

1. I am very open-minded and accepting.

2. I am respectful and direct in communicating things.

3. I have a big imagination and always am full of ideas, but the ideas typically only get there with enough prompting by me.

4. I would willingly drop anything and everything to be there for a friend that needed me.

5. I learning to be easygoing and accomodating of others preferences/ideas.

6. I'm willing to try most anything once.

7. I'm good at descriptive writing, though i wish too i would stop getting distracted and get back to music more.

8. I dont look how i did in high school.

9. I'm always growing.

10. I'm affectionate and show appreciation for the ones I love.

http://www.nippon1.co.jp/contents/game/disgaea/_apology.htm

can anyone tell me what in the heck that says? im really curious and i cant read it.

;_;

yet.

i must say....

the disgaea arrange soundtrack is verah cool.

^_^

got it last night.

the sky is electric purple and misty orange, lights haloed in auras of luminescence; as the rain beats against the trees and the birds rush out of them cawing, the puppies cower against the storm underneath protective arms. drops dot the porch as the cats look on, inky black and striped; the rabbits hunker down in their safe hutches, fairly dry from the onslaught of rain.

a song gets strung out of tune on the front porchswing, creaky from an old hook, but not for too long because the dogs cant be left alone-- even the old ones it seems still need their care, and that in and of itself seems to fulfill some deep, longing need inside me. wonderful though it is to watch the old dogs sit and look up at me, to watch the puppies play as if every moment was brand new to them, they cant answer me in back in a way that's satisfactory to me. funny though how i look to the dogs in some halfhearted attempt to find an answer to a question that i cant even begin to ask.

i can hear the cars pass on rain-slicked pavement, tires whooshing on the wetness as the treads push the water through the sides; the trees seem to surround this world in some sort of arboreal canopy, and right now they're creaking and swaying against thousands of tiny droplets. these forces are inescapable against the wind, as easily stopped as the very storm itself; radio towers flashing angrily red red stop red above the world.

crickets sing after the calm begins, when the world is so deathly silent it feels like that only you are there; only you, your thoughts, and seven dogs. i often wondered when my mind was going to be as quiet as the world after a rainstorm-- or often worried if that calm was going to be a prelude to a howling fury. it feels at times like my very mind is tearing itself apart, and then suddenly it feels like its not. but slowly, surely, an equilibrium is being built; and maybe one of these days i feel so pushed inside and overwhelmed by my desire to love so i can let someone love me in return.

someone started me there, gave me form, and i wished in some small way that maybe more quickly i couldve figured it out.

and i told her, given all my experiences, all the things that i wish i wouldve done and couldve done; i ultimately wouldntve changed them because then the end result wouldve been different and then i wouldnt be who i am. --i just hate in my moments of thoughtfulness, few they seem only when its so deathly still and quiet, that sometimes i wish myself better for her; that i could change things to where these things would never happen.

but, as they say, that's not the way to handle things, and i squarely refuse to blame myself for everything that ever happened in the world and im not taking accountability for anything not getting accomplished.

sirens keen in the distance, and i have to wonder if it's a fool's call. being where i am the likelihood is great, being there seeming to be a greater concentration of that here than other places. always sirens seem to follow the rain, like the crickets.

as they seem to gravitate, though, it's time to shoo the dogs out of the bedroom and into the living room.

thoughtfulness is tiring, ive found.

its hot and sticky today. x_x or i should say tonight.

namuch to report other than that-- wish there were someone online. lol.

although i did find out about my game, just forgot to mention it earlier.

i had my friend at work take my copy home (he has the game too) and try it on his ps2, and it fritzed his ps2 out also.. so its the game. now, i have to argue with them and try to get a factory sealed version of the game instead so im sure it works.

i hope its not too much trouble to do this. i dont think it will be, but i hate having to do this sort of thing.

im about at the end of my rope here on this one. can anyone help me?

i just bought xenosaga yesterday.. i played most of the evening, but when i started my game up today it started freezing and acting generally unpleasant. i went to springfield and exchanged it for one that had NO scratches on the surface. the save game will load now, but every time you get into a battle (every time) and it has to switch, the game freaks out and locks up. you cant even reset it at that point except from the machine itself. sometimes. and then you can! very frustrating.

i cant think of any real reason why it would do this. ive cleared the dust from the ps2 vents, checked the disc for dust/scratches (hell, my dark cloud 2 disc looks worse but runs like a champ), i even put tape on the painted surface to see if that would work, like it did with Super BAM 2. i wanna play this game, damn them, but i cant if the battles keep locking up like this.

help, anyone?

housecleaning today.

*shakes rug*

nothin personal if you're not there.

i twisted my back today. ~_~

boy i wish i could take some time off of work; ive got the days, just cant.

i know this is late in coming, but i want to say it just the same.

Everyone that grew up with you in their homes will miss you, Mr. Rogers, the only person i knew ever that was completely like they were in real life on television as well. Thank you for bringing us years of kindness and forgiveness lessons, and trying to ultimately tell everyone how to live their life the best.

it didnt matter the color, it didnt matter the religion, it didnt matter the sex. Mr. Rogers was Mr. Rogers, and his house in the neighborhood will never be the same now that he's not there, no more trolleys to the land of make believe.

so my best wishes to your family and dear friends, and a poignant goodbye from someone that remembered you being the one thing in his house that never changed.

I'll remember you always.

goodbye.

nathan

here

sleepy sleep.. gonna go sleep sleep spleep?

damn you, body. *shakes his fist angrily and wanders off to sleep again*

remember folks, guns dont kill people...

...damn dirty apes with guns kill people.

namuch to say today. cept i missed missy (hrm.) because i didnt set my alarm this mornin.. meant to wake up about 8:30 or so.. which woulda been when she was on. yeesh!

zelda officially sucks, stupid assed first dark palace. i beat you before like 10 years ago, what the hell is the deal? but enjoying nonetheless.

annnndddd. *drum roll* alk, welcome toooooo...

my friendslist.

didnt that sound dramatic? no? hrm.

but since i harass you on IMC i thought id harass you here too. i like to spread the love.

everything here is melty and muddy.

its one of those nonpoetic days...

~*~

all rolled into one! my preachy, pretentious message and my christmas sentiment. enjoy, because its most likely all youll see out of me about christmas at any great detail. and just so happens to not even be my own work to begin with. so nyah.

~~~

So this is Xmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Xmas
I home you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

And, so this is Xmas
For weak and for strong
For rich and the poor ones
The world is so wrong
And so happy Xmas
For black and for white
For yellow and red ones
Let's stop all the fight

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

And, so this is Xmas
And what have we done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And, so happy Xmas
We hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very Merry Xmas
And a happy New Year
Let's hope it's a good one
Without any fear

john lennon, happy xmas

~~~

there ya have it, food for thought.

night everyone. *clicks off the light*

administrivia..

since she's actually been posting lately, welcome back rosenoel. ^_^

been a while.

im here, im here, after mashed thumbs and bumped heads.

its cold here.

this wont mean a lot to most people, except probably april...

Stan Kelly, one of the guys that hauls off our cull to the farmers (the byproduct of cleaned seed is empty hulls, dust, sticks, twigs-- it makes a good supplement to cattlefeed) is dead.

According to kevin when i talked to him today, they found his truck and his body just west(?) of town, where 160 and 245 meet, i believe-- at about seven am.

he was a great friend to all of us that worked there, who knew him, even though he was a loud pain in the ass. we all loved stan. ive never heard kevin that upset, except when he was having heart problems. i feel guilty now about not goin in, but kevin said it was okay (i called in again, still feeling yucky)

i'm sorry, stan, more than you'll know. i'm sorry for your family. they're missing a great father.

~stops because he cant type anymore~

later guys...

i probably at one point had something to type here, but im just going to say that im around today. another day down...

i watched the sunrise today, seemed different than usual. celestial push-up pop almost. you know, the orange sherbet kind.

today seems empty.

its lighter right now than usual,
the house doesnt seem quite so dark....

oh, daylight savings time, will i ever get used to you?